Odd behaviour

[mell]

I have a "friend" and suddenly out of the blue with no good reason he started gossiping about me
and making comments about me that are not nice or true. He is very emotionaly restrained and has truble showing his feelings. It is probably due to his upbringing, his family has a very strange relationship. They don't give things to each other, they buy them from each other, if you don't like a thing you got for chrismas you simply sell it to someone in your family. He is not used to show any emotional feelings towords any one. Back to the story my suspicion is that he kind of likes me because at times it was apperent from his reactions  and body language. I was just wondering if he is subconsciously trying to manifest his feelings because he knows i'm not interested and he is afraid of rejection so he'll rather push me away what are your toughts on the situation?

[pert -5]

Back to the story my suspicion is that he kind of likes me because at times it was apperent from his reactions  and body language.

That is called supposition.  I wouldn't bet my bank on it.

what are your toughts on the situation?

I would toss this "friend" to the side in the most irrevocable way possible.

[mell]

Be sure thar i plane to ignore him and don't want any contact with him, but i'm just interested in the way people like him function. He seems to be very insecure in so many ways he always critises peoples apperence and i'll tell you for sure he is not that hamdsom that he could afford this. Do you think his upbringing had anything to do with it?

[pert -5]

Be sure thar i plane to ignore him and don't want any contact with him, but i'm just interested in the way people like him function. He seems to be very insecure in so many ways he always critises peoples apperence and i'll tell you for sure he is not that hamdsom that he could afford this. Do you think his upbringing had anything to do with it?

Almost inveritably that is the cause.  The most pronounced personality traits are usually developed during childhood and adolescence, whether that entails family interaction or behavior with friends or both.  Behavioral cognizance is a conditioned response.

[docjp]

I have a "friend"... I was just wondering if he is subconsciously trying to manifest his feelings because he knows i'm not interested and he is afraid of rejection so he'll rather push me away what are your toughts on the situation?

Perhaps you are allowing too much "intention" albeit "sub-conscious" to this friend? More likely I suspect that his own fear of intimacy is working [his MIND in order to protect him from a deeper fear], has resorted to spreading rumors, relying on your disdain to cause you to distance yourself from him.  Thus avoiding being abandoned.

Befriending anyone is opening oneself to danger, but people do it all the time. You are more correct than not, regarding this person,  and being forewarned.... etc.

[hortonpilot]

This is a hard one.......
Manipulative and less than honest behavior end in trouble for all.
Who needs this crap in their life?

Horton

[acousticeagle]

My guess is that, from the clues you've given about how this friend's family buy and sell to each other, is that this friend has found you in someway 'generous' or giving - some aspect of your personality. And he's come, after a while, to rely on you for this. And when you haven't maybe been forthcoming, according to his need of it, in that personality generosity, he's become offended. Hence the gossiping.

You've distanced yourself and that's what you need to do; no one needs gossip/back-biting. It hurts tho' when people we've regarded once as friends do this to us, eh?