Do i have schitzophrenia?

[thegreatoutdoor]

If you have heard voices in the past, but they are less frequent in the present does that automatically mean you have schizophrenia?

I almost constantly worry about things. To the point where i cant work. I cant enjoy life much. I'm not depressed about this. I'm really tough as nails. But, i hate that i'm wasting my life. I have worried about several thoughts over the past 6 years. And the ones that i "figured out", and saw that they couldnt/werent true, i cant believe i worried about them. So what i'm saying is my past worries i think are SUPER stupid. But while i was worrying about them, they did not.

Everything bad started after being in an abusive home. I was not abused, except because i sided with my mom, i did not get any money. I constantly came home during middle school, and walked on eggshells. Because, where my dad had broken doors, or pulled the phone out of the wall and yelled, i was scared of him.
So was i merely exhausted when these thoughts started?
 I didn't eat well. During middle school, and this unpeaceful home phase, i went to school, tried my best , and only like ate 1 meal a day.
My first worry was... what if God doesn't know my heart. Well after months and months, it finally clicked. That if there was a God that cared about me, and he was that powerful to control my eternal life, then he would know my heart.
So i let that one go.

Then, shortly thereafter, I started worrying about little gods. This may have been sparked because i read something or saw something on tv, idk. But, it was "what if there are little gods, one over my city that i live in, one and then one, somewhere in remote China where i knew i would never go visit. I somehow couldn't figure out that such a small God, couldn't cause everlasting harm. But while i was in this worrying phase, no one could explain to me why i shouldn't worry about it.

I look back on this thought, and cant believe how stupid i was!

Now i happened to see the matrix. The movie with Keano Reeves about our lives being a computer simulation. And now, i'm stuck on this one! "I'm worried that i'm in a matrix, or semi-matrix, where i have to go crazy to see the real world, or i have to do certain....rituals to get to the real world."

Why are rituals always tied into these worries? Is this ocd and schitzophrenia?


Thank you.

[DevilsAdvocate]

I have been diagnosed with OCD and Paranoia. I too have had worries like that. I used to and still do once in a while wonder about the Truman Show. I flipped out thinking that someone was watching me and was screwing with my fate. I had to do random acts of kindness so "they" would not mess with me. I started to fear that I was losing my mind. I knew that other high school kids were not fretting about a Jim Carey movie as much as I was. I ended up turning it into a game. I added a hint of sarcasm to the way I did things. "Ooooh better help that elder with her groceries so I dont get smited during the next thunderstorm." And eventually is all seemed like such a preposterous concept that I simply let it go. If only I could find a trick so I could let go of my OCD rituals... hmm