help!

[liza123]

i started a communication with someone in facebook. initially, the person accepted me as his friend. i suppose that i sort of got excited...so, as usual, i started commenting on this and that...and asked whatever question that popped into my head...all of a sudden, he just cut me off...with no reason given. i was upset. so, i sent e-mails asking why...no reply. then, i managed to get his number and called him...he said that he is not angry ...just busy with his work. but, if there is anything IIMPORTANT, then, i can call him...i do not know his definition of important so i have not called him since....

why do you think that he cut me off as his friend? i mean, he told me to shoot him with questions etc and that is what i did..of course, he thought that i did not anything about him..the thing is that i have met him(my friend talked to him and i sort of observed him and i foolishly wrote all these to him)...did he freak out?

[SWM]

most likely you and he had different expectations of how a friendship develops. it sounds like you were seeking to develop a friendship very quickly and for he was not very comfortable with that. too much, too soon. it sounds like he is busy and that would mean that he does not have too much time to spend answering lots of questions and developing a new frienship/relationship.

[anaklio]

I empathize. I hate it when people break off communication without explanation. It seems like he has information that would benefit you. Don't let it get to  you, but also look for patterns and try to make adjustments.

For example, I have a friend who gets fired at every job. At first, I agreed with him that he was getting screwed over. But after it happened the !fifth! time you realized that there's more to the story. Might that be true here?

[liza123]

I empathize. I hate it when people break off communication without explanation. It seems like he has information that would benefit you. Don't let it get to  you, but also look for patterns and try to make adjustments.

For example, I have a friend who gets fired at every job. At first, I agreed with him that he was getting screwed over. But after it happened the !fifth! time you realized that there's more to the story. Might that be true here?

precisely...i wanted to know if he had some info or someone said something about me to him...but, he was not forthcoming even through phone..

well, with regards to patterns and such, this is the first time someone has done that to me...it really sucks!
normally, people respond to me in a proper manner...

 SWM might be right...i went too quickly for him...he does strike me as the reserved type...his job has to do with the art industry...they are sort of reserved, highly emotional and sensitive, aren't they?

[anaklio]

As you get older you'll often see things in a different light. Initially I often thought there was "no explanation" but then it hit me. That's why it's important for you to reflect on EVERYTHING. But you shouldn't dwell either. I'm glad you have this forum to reflect. Hopefully you'll be able to come to terms with it. Some times (and for me it's a lot of times) you think too much and this in a bizarre way prevents you for thinking clearly.

[liza123]

As you get older you'll often see things in a different light. Initially I often thought there was "no explanation" but then it hit me. That's why it's important for you to reflect on EVERYTHING. But you shouldn't dwell either. I'm glad you have this forum to reflect. Hopefully you'll be able to come to terms with it. Some times (and for me it's a lot of times) you think too much and this in a bizarre way prevents you for thinking clearly.

Thanks for your post. You are right. I am glad that I used this forum to reflect...SWM and you have helped me in my reflection. And I have the same problem as you...I think too much..it is not really good, so, i am trying to relax in this aspect(make my mind clearer!)..And of course, I have to control my impulses as well(going too fast!)