The paradoxical theory of change

[ellion]

The paradoxical theory of change is one of the fundamental organizing principles in Gestalt therapy, with far-reaching implications. Only by being what and who one is can one become something or someone else. Effort, self-control, or avoidance focused exclusively on the future will not bring about change. We must become our truth (ourselves) first before we can move from it (change). Vice versa, if we try to be different without finding what is true for us, we are following someone else’s truth and will not bring about the long-term change to which we aspire.
All the energy that can get locked up in the battle between trying to change and resisting change can become available for active participation in our life processes. External as well as internal controls interfere with the healthy working of an organism.

[Bill Hemphill]

Your approach to Psychology seems Existential. You say "All the energy that can get locked up in the battle between trying to change and resisting change can become available for active participation in our life processes." As individuals we are always becoming. When we find ourselves not  "becoming" and taking the time to actually "be", we are not happening. When we are not happening, we are not happy.

The key is to understand the energy and utilize it. When the energy is present, one should "become" in the manner that they consciously see as appropriate. This steals the energy from the unwanted social component that you were saying we must be true to. It is not truth to be true to a mistake. It is a combination of ignorance and honesty. That can lead to psychosis. Take the energy away from the neurotic thought. I hope this helps. Bill

[Bill Hemphill]

When you say "External as well as internal controls interfere with the healthy working of an organism." , that omits responsibility. It is important to understand that the mind and body are  responding. Cunning destroys.

[pixx]

Just a couple of reflections:
- We ARE energy (in its essence of existence), we can only reorganize energy.
- Change is constant, it is our hierarchy of memory that we are keeping, what bothers me is that we more try to fulfill what we "know" than challenge it (preservation of integrity, perhaps?)
- Paradox is logical exercise - it only shows that logic we use have shortcomings or limitations we place in setting of the observed problem fail to conform to the domain of the problem. Consequence: we seek better logic. (or have enlightenment or religious experience)
- There are always leaders and followers, when we follow, we follow the "truth" someone else served us in concise form that we can relate to. It is laziness to think, because if we think we would be all struggling to be leaders. This is not socially viable. We are mainly thought through all our educations to "follow", rarely someone will educate us to lead (unless you are meant to be leader (or want to be, or are by your personal traits)).

Hope these couple of reflections kick some lateral thought.

[Bill Hemphill]

ellion, There is no true for ones' self. That would suggest that thoughts, ideas, and suggestions are always true. You should not try to be something that is false, it won't prove you to be true to yourself.

The old idea that you have be what and who one is before you change, is a false notion that has long existed amongst the Psychologists and Psychiatrists who at best have a 2 or 3% success rate. Their beliefs contribute to their absolute inability to treat people.

LET ME HELP! The fact is that there is a place in the brain where we have recorded a way of response to  the triggers of the outside world. We are always responding. We must return to that part of the brain where we can feel the response(maybe the response we don't want), we don't have to respond that way but we can recognize it and replace it with another way of response. Yes, what I am telling you is fact!

When we replace a response that we like with a response we find more suitable, it is done effortlessly. because we don't go through this false notion that we "have" to  "be" this false response. Yeah, that's right! IT IS ACTUALLY THE IDEA THAT THE THOUGHTS IDEAS AND SUGGESTIONS THAT EXIST IN THE THE WORLD AND THEREFORE WE BECOME AWARE OF, NEED NOT BE US.

It is a huge mistake to refer to these things as who we are or true to who we are. THEY ARE IN FACT FALSE TO WHO WE ARE AND THAT IS WHY WE ARE DEALING WITH THEM.

Anyone who has hopes of treating someone should take the time to understand what I have said here. If you don't or can't understand, I do not believe you will be successful in your treatments of people. You are saying that you can't do it, treat an individual that is.

[Bill Hemphill]

People are equal, it is their personalities that are not equal.